AdventureYou + AdventureMe = AdventuroUS

Excercise: See if you can point to the Torres Del Paine on a map

I'll Give you a HINT:

Heres a Trail Map to keep you guided throughout our tour of the national park:

When we strolled into puerto netales with our 20lbs backpacks on plannin on hiking from the paine grande domes to campamiento britanica, up to the mirador, back to italiano, around the U to the Torres Campsite, up to the torres and back it sounded like a good idea. that's 9 hours, then 12 hours, then 5 hours on sunday. when we wandered into a camping store to rent equipment, and our packs became 50 pounds, we decided, since walking out of this store standing is going to be hard, let's reevaluate and not walk 12 hours. please?

Magellan Straight

We met a dude named Christian who ran the store, and he rerouted us. we would then decide to go to britanica, then after the walk back down to the lake the second day, take the boat across and hike from Hosteria Torres up to the torres, catch the torres for sunrise the third day and hike back down in time to take a bus back to punta arenas. 

If you're lost, dont worry. so am i.

So we strolled confindently up to campamiento Britanica, a solid 5 and half hour uphill hike across some crazy landscape. We threw down our stuff, (we were the only ones there) and Carol decided to stay at the tent to pray (she said she'd also cook dinner) and Charles and I decided we'd not pray, instead we'd go to the top of the mirador another 45 minutes or so and see some crazy ass mountains. (pics below). When we got back, it was dark, and cold. we ate rice and spicy katchup (thank you tobasco) and went to sleep, planning on leaving at 6am, pack up and leave just in time to walk the 5 hours down and catch the boat back across the lake so we could hike 5 more hours up to a different set of crazy ass mountains. (actually they're called Torres.) ok. torres. thank you ranger rick.

If you want a religious experience, you might want to head to the mirador at britanica. i'm not one for feelings, but i thought it necessary to yell "ON TOP OF THE WORLD" towards the nearest mountain, which politely decided to throw a couple hundred pounds of snow off its edge as appreciation. the mountain also reminded me that we were on the bottom of the world. I reminded him that its all about perspective.

There were always a lot of moments that I wished this person or that person would've come. I thought this was something that would be appreciated by everyone. You think, oh how nice it would be to have so and so here and enjoy this with me. JJ was one of those people. Then you realize he'd light the forest on fire (green), and then probably the tent, use up all our gas and then look at us through all the burning destruction like "what? quit bein so mad uptight. everything is fine. I'm so mad chill. Mad. Chill. Did I say mad chill in this sentence yet?" then he'd take off his shoes, ruin your sense of smell permanently because of the stink, fall asleep and snore so loud that you wouldnt be able to help feeling conflicted. Because on one hand, it's for sure keeping the bears away, but it's also keeping you awake. until you catch another wiff of his feet and pass out.

Due to some Alarm Setting difficulties (CAROL), we awoke to find it to be 8am. actually, Charlie awoke to find it to be 8am. i never actually awoke. because i was frozen.

On a scale from 1 to "i hate camping" packing a cold wet tent and doing dishes in a river THAT CAME FROM A GLACIER (ill let you decide how cold that is. yes. i could see the glacier. 80 FEET AWAY--is that even enough time for it to really melt? i mean, WHATS THE POINT OF SUN IF IT ISNT WARM?) 

its 9am. boat leaves at 1230. trail takes 5 1/2 hours. due to some apprehension about staying another night on a glacier, i ran down the mountain. in fact. all 3 of us ran down the mountain. the trail is supposed to take 5 1/2 hours. i told you that already. im gonna tell you again. 5 1/2 hours. we got to the boat in 3. hours. thats 2 1/2 hours less than the average hiker and 10 minutes faster than Bear Grylls. haha just kidding Bear Grylls walked to patagonia from vancouver in 5 1/2 hours....

hiking down a mountain fast is hard. so some crazy adventurous bastards decided to make it harder by starting random trails that lead no where. I was constantly confused as to which way to go because the trail splits and you know (from the 40 times you did this before) that one leads to no where and one leads to the bottom. Someone managed to always pick the wrong one. fortunately, in the forest, the trail is marked with orange florescent trail markers. ironically florescent orange is also the color of the wildflowers that grow on the bushes in patagonia. great color choice for a trail marker. DID YOU NOT HAVE ANY OTHER COLOR PAINT? 

 here's a map in case you forgot where we were. did i point out we're in antartica? how about that chile has claimed part of antartica?

 this is the micro brewery in puerto netales. and the only thing to do there. unless you like being cold. because that option is always available.

probably the same mountain......(i dont care if its the eiger)

 glacier. we didn't sleep on it. not because we didnt want to.....I DIDNT WANT TO.

 TEAM EXTREME!!!!!!!!!!!

for those of you who have been on facebook already, you'll notice this is the 30th time i was captured doing the team extreme pose. since you weren't there, you were saved the other 98 times that i did this pose without being photographed. thats a total of 129 team extreme poses. (thats pretty extreme)

REPPING ADVENTURE CREW FROM THE SOUTHERN CONTINENT.

 heres the lake we crossed on the boat. the camera didn't quite capture the blue. it was however, identical to the color of the girls jacket that is in the picture below. and WHAT'S THIS??? A CHILEAN WITH A NORMAL HAIRCUT???

 ...........................................................................................................................................................
.............................................................are you kidding?

Once we got across the lake, we had to take a short shuttle to the hostel where we would start our second 5 hour hike of the day. 

Read this sign:

Do you think we got out?....

We hiked up and along a ridge for a long time. here are some pictures. 

 WHAT UP.

Now, we planned on getting up at 6 am to go hike another hour to the mirador of the torres, just in time to catch the sunrise. On a scale of 1 to "i hate camping" waking up at 5 am and packing a wet tent in the cold is a 10. did i mention it was cold? how about wet? snowing? ah yes it was snowing. sideways in fact. it was snowing sideways. apparently gravity is different on the southern hemisphere. OR WAIT. THATS JUST HOW WINDY IT WAS. did i mention i didn't have gloves? how about that i was in shorts.

Here's the torres before sunrise.

the other direction from the torres:

dude. come on. 10$ for a beer? that is barely worth taking a picture of. you just got poorer looking at this picture.

For those of you who remember the pinnacles in malaysia, this was a lot like that. except the pinnacles were warm. and only lasted one day. not 3. my knees hurt.

On a scale from 1 to hardest thing i've ever done this posts a 9. was it worth it? um. yes. yes it was.

as snoop would say. TO THE BIATCH. (im such a playa) <---disclaimer. spanish joke credit goes to blonde girl.

dooood. goin to the biach.

fun cam vs. turista cam. fun cam wins.

 our bus that we took to vinha. i dont remember any of it because i was durmido.

 Sweet flow. chile needs to learn the differencia entre un MULLET y flo dulce. like mine.

Vinha del Mar is super hilly. this is the street where our tiny little hotel was. we didnt go to valparaiso but if we did it would look a lot like this but with more graffiti and cooler colors.

 EAST SIDE MUHFUCKAH (sorry mom).

fun cam vs. party cam. fun cam wins again.

 check out the artsy pic yo.

 this little castle has the nice view of the mar and is host to a fine dining room. where i took myself on a date. i didnt. but i thought about it.

 No one in chile actually owns a dog. whenever they feel like finding some canine love, they just walk outside and are greeted by the 150 million stray dogs that live there. 150 million is an estimate. an underestimate.

 does this look like panama? or maybe a tiny miami? or maybe a lame version of a cool city? or maybe a lame version of a lame city?

if i were rich i'd stay here.

 "put it on things of above and not of those on the earth"...i donno. looked poetic tho.

edgy angsty liberal anti conformist photo. Local chain (telepizza) vs. world chain (mickey D's in the background). i wore my "i travelled the world but i still havent found myself yet." t shirt for this photo. then i went and took pictures of sad things so i could feel cultured.

 prof pic. livin life with no remorse.













SAND SCULPTURES. hardcore artists with a soft side. that they harden with water.

 fin. shell. noggin. DOOOOOOOD.

 to this i respond, "No."

 sea horse.

BEACH CHILLIN. yes, it is possible to to get burned on a cloudy day. and no, red skin is not cooler than white skin. and yes, i know this first hand.

 this little ginger creature followed us the whole beach. there literally are more stray dogs than people in chile. and while one might find an accurate comparison between a certain type of beach goer and these friendly mangy lost canines, i actually am referring to the dogs.

 the parque. where seemingly everyone under 30 goes to make out. in public. the fact that i have yet to post a picture of PDA is more due to me being unable to pull out my camera due to hysterical laughter than lack of an opportunity.

stealth metro photo.
this young gentleman happens to be an excellent subject for observation in a brief experience with chilean culture. you may notice that he has short hair. or is that long hair? or is it both....all three observations would be accurate. and while he may seem all negocios (business) from the front, he is definitely all fiesta in the back. its like everyone goes to the barber and cant make up their minds so they walk out with both. my personal favorite besides the rat tail is the rat tail dreadlock. singular. like there is only one dread lock. which somehow found its way out of a seemingly normal haircut. such a nice haircut that i would have commended him on such a nice haircut had i not seen the dread lock. ah, and you may notice his pants are stuffed into his shoes. his shoes are that cool. yes he sacrificed fashion points to show you this. yes, he's glad you noticed. no, he will not turn down his reggeton music. yes he's aware that it is not playing through his headphones. in fact, i wasnt even mad. I was surprised his cell phone could play music that loud. i thought i was at a daddy yankee concert. i took this picture right before he started making out with his girlfriend....i somehow always miss my chance.....

 MONKEY TOE DOWN. yes its broken, no theres nothing i can do about it and yes ill stop complaining. since its hilly in vinha, there are a lot of little random steps everywhere. i found the front end of one with that middle guy.